
Being aware of your unborn baby at all times is the first stage in bonding with her and making sure you have a good relationship in the future. Keeping in touch means you’ll be aware of what’s best for your baby’s physical and emotional health.
WHAT YOUR BABY EXPERIENCES
Even while she’s in your womb, your baby feels, hears, sees, tastes, responds, and even learns and remembers. She’s not, despite what doctors used to think, an unformed, blank personality. She has firm likes and dislikes. She enjoys soothing voices, simple music with a single melody line (lullabies, flute music), rhythmic movements, and the feeling of your stroking her through your skin. Her dislikes include loud voices; music with an insistent beat (hard rock); strong, flashing lights; rapid, jerky movements; and being cramped when you sit or lie in an awkward position.
Sight Although your baby is protected by the walls of your womb and abdomen, very strong light can get through to her; she can detect sunlight if you’re sunbathing, for instance. What she sees is probably just a reddish glow, but from about the fourth month, she’ll respond to it, usually by turning away if it’s too bright. The limits of her sight at birth (she’ll be able to see faces within 12 in/30 cm of her own) may be a result of the limits of her “home” before she was born.
Sound Your baby’s sense of hearing develops at about the third month, and by midterm she’s able to respond to sounds coming from the outside world. She’s suspended in amniotic fluid, which carries sounds well, although what she hears will be muffled just like sounds are when you’re under water. She’s also able to make out the emotional tone of voices and moves her body in rhythm to your speech. She’ll be soothed if you use a soft, reassuring tone.
The sound of your heartbeat is a constant presence in her world, and this seems to have a lasting influence on her. In one study, newborn babies who were played a tape of mothers’ heart sounds gained more weight and slept better than a control group of babies who did not hear the tape.
A MOTHER’S INFLUENCE
Your unborn baby first experiences the world through you, her mother. Your baby senses not only things happening outside the womb (see above), but also your feelings. She can do this because our various emotions trigger the release of different chemicals into our bloodstream-anger releases adrenalin, fear releases cholamines, elation releases endorphins. These chemicals pass across the placenta to your baby within seconds of your feeling that particular emotion.
Babies don’t like their mothers to feel negative emotions, such as anger, anxiety, or fear, for long periods. But short bursts of intense anxiety or anger (caused by a moment of panic or an argument with your partner) don’t appear to have any long-term effect on your unborn child. They may even be good for her, as they may help her start to learn how to cope with stressful situations in the future. On the other hand, research suggests that long-term festering anger or anxiety, such as you might feel if you have relationship problems or an un-supportive partner, or you’re living in poor conditions, can be harmful for your baby. These effects may include a problematic birth, a low birth weight, being a colicky baby, and future learning problems. Fortunately, studies also show that if a mother is generally happy and positive about being pregnant and doesn’t shut out her unborn baby, any periods of negative emotions seem to have far less effect.
A FATHER’S INFLUENCE
As the expectant father, you are the second most important influence in your unborn baby’s life. Your attitude toward your partner, the pregnancy, and your child is crucial. If you’re happy and looking forward to your baby’s birth, your partner is much more likely to be content and to enjoy her pregnancy. Your baby, in turn, is much more likely to be a happy, healthy child. Try to talk to your unborn baby as often as you can-research has shown that newborn babies can recognize the voices of their fathers as well as their mothers.
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